The Blunt, Honest, Kinda Hilarious Truth about Motherhood

So, motherhood brought on a totally new and life changing experience for me. I took everyone's advice and prepared myself the best that I could with all of the stories I was told. BUT, what about the stuff people don't tell you about? Here's what I've learned since becoming a mother {the Blunt, Honest, Kinda hilarious truth!}

1. You will never be able to use the bathroom alone... again. 
2. Showering in peace is a thing of the past. 
3. All doors, drawers, and toilet seats must remained closed. 
4. "Climbing" will have a whole new meaning with a toddler. 
5. Sleeping past 8:00 a.m. no longer exists. 
6. You will also not need an alarm clock anymore. 
7. Peaceful shopping trips will be few and far between. 
8. People will always tell you their opinions on your parenting... whether you ask for them or not. 
9. Always hide your remote & keys- unless you want to hunt for them. 
10. In order to be on time, you must prepare and leave an extra 20 minutes early. 
11. You will have to pull all-nighters... whether you want to or not. 
12. A toddler doesn't care if your pregnant or not... be prepared to still go at warp speed, sick or not. :) 
13. The bathtub is no longer just a tub... it's a play land! 
14. If you have a boy- you are bound to get peed on at least once... if not more. 
15. They will poop their pants...even if you just changed them! 
16. The price of toys doesn't matter... 
17. Sometimes, a cup is more impressive to your child than a $50 toy! 
18. As a mother, you will learn every Fisher Price and Little Tikes song ever invented. 
19. You will learn to recite these songs, word for word, while driving in the car! 
20. Kids have a sixth sense when it comes to technology... they prefer your iPhone over a toy phone... any day! 
21. Your toddler will know more about an iPad than you ever will... 
22. You will learn to speak "jibberish" to the best of your ability... 
23. If you leave it out... be prepared for it to get thrown on the floor, torn up, put in the mouth, or lost. 
24. And FINALLY, be prepared to LOVE more than you could ever imagine possible! It's a crazy ride- but well worth it! :)