A Wonderful Mother...

I just read this on another blog of a mother who also has a preemie baby. I loved it and figured I would share it with you. You don't quite understand what it's like having a premature baby until you've lived through it. Sure, people can sympathize, empathize, and say nice words... but unless you experience it first hand... you don't understand how the littlest things are HUGE, how gaining just one ounce deserves a party, and how a little poop in the diaper is one of the biggest things to be celebrated. And that's completely understandable... because for most, these "milestones" happen without thinking...but for us with a preemie child... they were things to be celebrated and remembered! So, yes this poem basically sums it all up. How do I know I am the BEST mother for my child... Read on and you will know! :) 

There are women that become mothers without effort, without thought, without patience or loss, and though they are good mothers and love their children, 

I know that I will be better. 

I will be better not because of genetics, or money, or that I have read more books,

 but because I have struggled and toiled for this child.

I have sat in the NICU and waited.

I have cried and prayed.

I have endured.

Like most things in life, the people who truly have appreciation

 are those who have struggled to attain their dreams.

I will notice everything about my child.

I will take time to watch my child sleep, explore and discover.

I will marvel at my surviving miracle every day for the rest of my life.

I will be happy when I wake in the middle of the night to the sound of my child,

 knowing that I can comfort, hold and feed him 

and that I am not waking to an alarm going off, 

another round of meds

 or because I am crying tears for fear of the unknown.

I will be happy because my baby is alive and crying out for me.

I count myself lucky in this sense;

 that God has given me this insight,

 this special vision

 with which I will look upon my child that

 my friends will not see.

Whether I parent a preemie with physical challenges or medical issues, 

I will not be careless with my love.

I will be a better mother for all that I have endured.

 I am a better wife, a better aunt, a better daughter, 

neighbor, friend and sister

 because I have known pain.

I know disillusionment as I have been betrayed by my own body.

I have been tried by fire and hell that many never face, 

yet given time,

 I stood tall.

I have prevailed.

I have succeeded.

I have won.

So now, when others hurt around me, 

I do not run from their pain in order to save myself discomfort.

 I see it, mourn it, and join them in theirs.

I listen.

And even though I cannot make it better,

 I can make it less lonely.

 I have learned the immense power of another hand holding tight to mine, 

of other eyes that moisten as they learn to accept the harsh truth 

and when life is beyond hard....

I have learned a compassion

 that only comes with walking in those shoes.

I have learned to appreciate life.

Yes, I will be a wonderful mother.

Author Unknown